Tips For Improving Your Low Self-Esteem

 

Tips For Improving Your Low Self-Esteem. PART 1

Low self-esteem is the root cause of many of our problems. Poor self-esteem can sabotage relationships and careers, cause self-destructive patterns and habits, hamper self-improvement and hold us back from achieving our full potential. Poor self-esteem usually has its origins far back in our childhood, but it can be knocked again in our adult life by ridicule, criticism and trauma.

High self-esteem is the most important element in human performance. The person with healthy self-esteem likes him or herself. Not in a vain, conceited or big headed way but they simply like and accept themselves for who they are. These people perform at higher levels. They are calm, positive, purposeful, open, expressive, assertive, self-reliant, sociable, co-operative, energetic, optimistic and always looking for ways to self-improvement. When you are in the company of someone with high self-esteem you feel better about yourself, not worse.

Here are a few tips for developing higher self-esteem. There will be more to follow in another article.

• “Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission”, Betty Ford. Don’t give that permission to anyone. No matter how much people knock or criticise you in your life don’t let anyone put you down.

• Make lists of all your good qualities, abilities and all the achievements that you are proud of and really congratulate yourself for all of them.

• Take care of you appearance. Always be clean and look as neat and smart as your budget will allow. The way you dress does make a difference in helping you feel confident.

• Read stories about successful people and those who have triumphed over adversity. Find out how they achieved their success and use the information to help yourself towards self-improvement.

• Listen to and learn from motivational speakers either in person on CD, tape cassette or video.

• Move towards what you want to achieve in small easy steps. Don’t try to take a big jump all at once. Achieving the small steps will encourage you to press on towards your goal and self-improvement.

• Join the smile, firm handshake and compliment club. All these things matter, nobody trusts someone who doesn’t shake hands properly. If you see someone without a smile, give them yours. Complimenting someone when they deserve it not only boosts their self-esteem but yours as well because you have made someone feel good.

• Always finish what you start. When you complete something people pay you compliments and you feel better about yourself.

• Do something for others, especially those who can do nothing in return. “No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden a little for someone else”. Charles Dickens.

• Break bad habits. Stop smoking, drink alcohol only in moderation or stop altogether. Cut out junk food and eat a healthier diet.

• Make friends with your enemies. Life is too short to have people in it that you don’t get along with. That will really help your self-improvement.

• Choose your friends and the people you mix with carefully. Mix with positive people whose influence will help you to improve. Stay away from negative people and those who may influence you to do bad, negative things.

Tips For Improving Your Low Self-Esteem. PART 2

A low self-esteem can have a very detrimental affect on your life. Here are some more great tips for improving your self-esteem!

Perhaps the greatest authority on self-esteem is Jack Canfield Ph.D. who says: “People with high self esteem are winners”. But he also says that some quite successful people suffer from low self-esteem. People with low self-esteem tend to be: Controlling, afraid to risk, curt and abrupt with customers and less likely to participate in life and thus don’t become successful. The more things you try and the more things you do in life the greater your chance of becoming successful.

Psychologists believe that two out of every three people suffer from low self-esteem. So if you find yourself in a group of three people, one of you is okay but two of you are in trouble. If someone is criticizing you or giving you a hard time in some way here is an affirmation that Jack recommends which you can repeat silently in your head over and over again to cancel out the negative effect: “No matter what you say and do to me I am still a worthwhile person”. Here are some more tips:

• Learn to love to read and read positive, motivational and inspirational books and magazines that contribute to your self-improvement.

• Get fit. Not only will you feel better in yourself but about yourself.

• Learn good manners and how to behave in polite company. Swearing is not clever or adult and only makes you look ignorant.

• Use your imagination to choose what sort of person you want to be. Pick role models and use some of their qualities that you want to have in a visualisation to become the person you want to be. Great for self-improvement.

• Avoid negative media influences such as: Pornography, soap operas and horror films. Watch things that you can learn from, that will improve you as a person and inspire you. 

• Take courses that will improve you such as a public speaking course, further education or an assertiveness class.

• Make friends with all sorts of people no matter what their race, colour, religion or disability. If you accept others just as they are they will accept you. To have a friend you must first be a friend.

• Conquer your shyness, don’t let it dominate or spoil your life.

• Be well informed about current events and a variety of interesting subjects so that you may have better conversations with others.

• Develop a passion for a hobby or particular subject. Not only will you meet other people through a hobby or interest but also others love to listen to highly inspired, enthusiastic speakers and it bring about mutual self-improvement.

• Take a few risks. As the title of the well-known book says, “Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway”. Start a conversation with a stranger, be the first in your peer group to try a new fad or fashion, go bungee jumping, or white water rafting. Have yourself an adventure, it will make you a great attraction at parties, you will have achieved something and have happy memories you can look back on and talk about for the rest of your life. Today is the first day of the rest of you life so get out there and do some living!

• Replace negative thoughts with positive ones. Use the affirmation “I like myself!” this is thought to be the most powerful affirmation there is. Make up other affirmations to cheer you up when you are depressed and to keep you positive. The best known one is: “Every day in every way I am getting better and better”.

Self Help To Raising Your Low Self-Esteem

Everyone at sometime has a crisis of confidence, but for some having a low self-esteem can have a debilitating effect on them throughout their lives, here a few tips to raise your self-esteem.

We all want to live successful and happy lives, but for those suffering from a low self-esteem this can be incredibly difficult. However miserable and worthless you may feel, there are many ways that you can raise your self-esteem and in turn greatly improve your quality of life. Here are a few ways that you can help yourself to achieve this.

Your first step is to think positively about your past achievements. Now don`t just drop your shoulders and say you haven`t had any, everyone has! However small and insignificant it may seem, it is a success that you have achieved and should be thought of with pride. Also focus on the positive aspects of your life and think about what it is that makes your life worthwhile. Don`t accept negative experiences as normal and expect everything to go badly, every one of them will have something positive to be gained from them.

This part can be very difficult for some people but go with me, now focus on the things that you like about yourself. YES, there is something, don`t tell me that there isn`t! It could be your kind nature, your eyes or your legs, and your family and friends obviously think there is a lot about you to like so think outside the box and look at yourself from their point of view. If there are parts of yourself that you really dislike, is there any way that you can change them? If there isn`t, then acceptance is the key. This is part of you and goes towards making you the unique individual that you are. Who wants to be like everybody else?

We are our own worse critics, and for those with low self-esteem that inner voice is booming with negativity. That voice should be giving you constructive criticism and not finding fault with you. Spend as much time with people who are strong and positive, negative people create a negative vibe. Supportive people will raise your self-esteem by embracing you in their nurturing and positive environment. Never compare yourself with others and rate yourself against others. There will always be those who have more than you, and there will always be those who have less. Always think that the glass if half full instead of half empty, and be grateful for what you have got as there are those who are an awful lot worse off. If you aren`t good at a hobby or sport, this isn`t meant for you. Give it up and find one that you are good at, your confidence and self-esteem will soar once you find your niche.

Take a good look at your best qualities; you may be kind or gentle, a good listener, a good friend or be very loving. These, and many more, are attributes to be proud of and the world would be a better place if everyone had your qualities. Try and make a space for yourself in your home which is a haven from the outside world and a place where you can totally relax. Surround yourself with special thing such as good music, books and even people if they make you feel good. Your final step to raising your self-esteem is to forgive yourself when you don`t accomplish something and move on. Chances are that you have set your goals unrealistically high, so adjust them to suit you. A negative experience can easily be turned into a positive one with the right attitude.

Final Toughts

I hope these ideas will help you to raise your self-esteem. Remember we are all unique individuals with different abilities. Once you accept who you are and what you are capable of, your life will much improve.

Also Read

5 Ways To Boost Your Self Esteem In Right Ways

8 Steps To Change Negative Attitude Into Positive